No, I wasn't thinking of going to the gynecologist and dentist the same day (although that probably tops swimsuit shopping) That would be swimsuit shopping with a teenager...For anyone who has not done this it may very well be one of the circles of hell......Drama Queen got invited to go to the beach with a friend next weekend for spring break (man, I wish I had friends like that...) so this of course requires a small shopping trip for a couple of pair of shorts and a new swimsuit.....Her daddy would very much prefer any swimsuits involving her look similar to this...
Which is a pretty far stretch from the cute little bikini she wants from Aeropostale....Last year we had major drama when she got invited to a friends birthday party which was being held at a water park....She of course wanted to wear her bikini (which her daddy let her have with the understanding it was to be worn only in our pool or around girlfriends....NOT in public...) it turned into a full fledged meltdown that involved tears, cries of becoming a social outcast (yeah, we hear that one a lot), etc.....After the final ultimatum of you wear a one-piece or you are not going, she sucked it up and wore it.....Then when I dropped her off I swear to god every other girl there (probably 8-10) had on a damn bikini (proving apparently she was gonna be a social outcast - but, oh well what doesn't kill us makes us stronger.....) all these other girls who come from "good" families and a few whose parents I would have thought would have actually been more conservative than me...Now I know the whole if everybody else jumped off a bridge thing, but I did realize when I saw all the other girls maybe we were a little too strict on this....and who really wants there kid to be the one sticking out like a sore thumb (can you believe I, a 35 year old am falling for the peer pressure?)
So here we go to the mall...I let her try on the bikini and make her try on the only one piece in the store which is a "monokini" - the crazy thing is to me the monokini looks more obscene then the plain ole' bikini...Yes it does have a little more fabric and the stomach is covered, but the way it cuts in on the sides is just suggestive or something - I don't know it is just kinda weird to me....I think her daddy's biggest problem is not only is she growing up, but she actually looks pretty good in a bikini (of course, who wouldn't when they are a freaking size 0 and haven't had 3 kids, and stretch marks that look like a roadmap of China) which of course means evil hormonal teenage boys would be looking at his baby.....so I let her get the bikini and tell her she has to try it on for her daddy (Hey, if he could try and make me look bad over the offering to buy new cheerleading tryout shoes, this is the least I can do - payback is hell ain't it...)
We get home, and I tell her to go ahead and try it on for him. He immediately says if it has to be tried on for him, he knows he probably ain't gonna like it...So she parades into the living room and he looks at her and then at me (kinda like I have two horns growing out of my head or I am the antichrist) and says "I cannot believe your momma would buy that for you, and where is it you think you are gonna wear it?" So I try and do some damage control, and say "well, you know she is going to the beach so she plans on wearing it there?" Again, I get the look from him....She gives me the "help, I know I am sinking look," and I am caught between the two...I mean he can be pretty old school at times - don't even get me started on that freaky music he makes us listen to that gags us all at times....but I too am stuck with the realization that yes, members of the male gender will be checking out my baby.....So what to do? I am not really sure - the tags are still on the bikini and I am torn....Words of wisdom would be appreciated in a prompt manner since she leaves on Thursday....
This brings home what people say about "boys are easier"...Yep, deciding I agree on that one - cause hopefully I will never have to deal with one of the boys wanting a bikini (or we will have much bigger problems than the bikini apparently....)
3 Comments:
Ya'll are not alone. Bikinis are for our pool only, and then sometimes, I don't want to look at the bikinis. Whole pieace for public.
We got lucky and bought ours last year at Dillards...I spent 35 bucks and got 6 tommy swimsuits... yay me...I had all the drama last year
Thanks for the comment and I will leave the hurdles alone for sure now that I lost the fight with it!!
That's a tough call. But since you've already purchased it, buy her a wrap of some sort and tell her she has to wear it when she's not in the water.
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